The Clumsy Child

Most children are clumsy sometimes; that is, they might drop something that they were expected to hold on to with their fingers, or trip over an object lying on the floor when they are expected to manoeuvre past it easily. A child is described as ‘clumsy’ when she shows occasional episodes of poor coordination in her fingers, hands, arms or legs.

In recent years, psychologists have studied severe clumsiness (dyspraxia) and found that it affects around 5 per cent of all children. Four times as many boys than girls experience a developmental problem with physical coordination. Scientists link the clumsy child’s weak physical skills to the failure of neurons in the brain to develop properly.

Severe clumsiness affects a child in a number of ways, not just physically. Their self-esteem may also be affected. The typical child ages three or four is quick to recognise that others can catch a ball better than her, hold a crayon better than her, and carry objects from one place to another without letting them slip through her fingers. Then there is the social dimension; for example, she may be left out of team games because her performance is slow and awkward. Over time, this can severely dent her confidence and motivation.

If you are concerned about your child’s coordination skills, consult your doctor. Chances are that your three-year-old’s clumsiness is normal and will improve spontaneously with age. However, if a medical assessment does confirm that dyspraxia underlies her coordination difficulties, then the earlier she gets help for this, the better.

Supporting The Clumsy Child

Here are some techniques to help a clumsy child improve her coordination:

Have realistic expectations:
Children mature at different rates, and yours won’t master a physical skill until she is ready to. Never force your child to be too adventurous on play equipment, in the hopes of improving her coordination skills.

Be patient:
Although some physical acts may seem easy from your point of view, a child who is clumsy will find them to be much more demanding. Try not to get annoyed when she drops a plate or trips over the rug yet again. Remember that she doesn’t do this deliberately.

Provide opportunities for success:
Your clumsy child’s self-confidence lifts every time she masters a task involving coordination, so try to pick activities that are within her capability. Select a task that matches her current ability, but one that also challenges her.

Practise with her:
Most activities for developing physical skills can take place without a lot of equipment. Throwing and catching a ball, running on grass and hopping along the ground are all suitable activities for improving coordination.

Make coordination activities fun:
Your four-year-old learns best when she has fun, not when she is tense and anxious about her performance. Laughing and joking with her as she balances on tiptoes, for instance, will help to put her at ease.

Encourage outdoor play:
Many parks have safe play areas for young children, with lots of climbing equipment made out of smooth wood, safely bolted together. Encourage your child to try this equipment out, but make sure to stand close by to catch her should she fall.

Break physical tasks into stages:
Your child might not realise that every athletic activity is made up of a series of smaller activities, usually in sequence. Help her by identifying these small steps, walking her through them and then teaching her how to master them in proper sequence.

Say that again?

If your child is a slow talker, does that mean there’s something wrong? A speech therapist talks us through the process of how speech and language disorders are formed.

Why is it that some children are born to chatter like monkeys, while others take their time, carefully considering each vowel and consonant? For the many mothers who wonder why their children are slow talker, realisation is tinged with worry – is my child having a speech delay?

* What is a speech and language delay?

A speech delay refers to the acquisition of speech sounds in the correct order, but at a slower rate. This includes disorders like stuttering, where uncontrollable repetitions and blocks break up the normal flow of speech. In the disorder called childhood apraxia of speech, children cannot consistently put a sequence of sounds together to say syllables or words, and there is no neurological reason or muscle weakness. An articulation disorder refers to a condition where a child finds it difficult to for certain speech sounds properly (lisping) or he cannot produce a particular sound (like the ‘y’ sound). And in a phonological disorder, the child can produce a sound correctly but may use it in the wrong position in a word, or in the wrong word. For example, he may use the ‘t’ sound instead of the ‘k’ sound, and so will say ‘tea’ instead of ‘key’. On the other hand, a language delay happens when a child’s language is developing in the right sequence, but at a slower rate, which is common among children with developmental delays or who is mentally retarded. The word ‘language’ refers to the system of expressing and receiving information in a way that is meaningful (things to do with meanings, rather than sounds).

* How often does it happen?

Speech delays occur in up to 10 per cent of children. The most common causes of speech delays include hearing loss, slow development and mental retardation. But there are other causes, like psychological deprivation (where the child doesn’t spend enough time talking with adults), being a twin, autism (a developmental disorder), elective mutism (when the child just doesn’t want to talk) and cerebral palsy, which is a movement disorder caused by brain damage. Out of every 200 children, it is estimated that eight will have articulation disorders, two will have language disorders, two will stutter, and one will suffer from a voice disorder.

Look Out For These Tell-tale Signs

Children aged 1 – 2 years:

• Isn’t using gestures, such as pointing or waving ‘bye-bye’ by 12 months.
• Prefers gestures over vocalisations to communicate by 18 months.
• Has trouble imitating sounds by 18 months.

Children above 2 years:

• Can only imitate speech or actions and doesn’t say words or phrases spontaneously.
• Says only certain sounds or words repeatedly and can’t use oral language to communicate more than his immediate needs.
• Can’t follow simple directions.
• Is not understood more than half of the time.

Children in school:

• Says incorrect speech sounds even after the age of seven.
• Has difficulty understanding and remembering information.
• Has persistent difficulties paying attention in class.
• Has problems describing events or telling stories.

It is important to check your child’s development against language developmental milestones regularly. If you suspect that he may have a speech and /or language problem, consult your paediatrician for a developmental check-up and get a referral to see a speech and language therapist. A speech therapist will do an assessment on your child’s development, language and speech, and provide information, counselling and recommend further help if necessary. If a child does have possible difficulties with his speech, early intervention will better help him achieve his potential.

Parents play a crucial role in setting up a good environment for their child’s speech and language development at home. Tips on how to encourage and develop your child’s language skills:

• Expand on your child’s responses: Repeat what your child says and then add one or two new words. Your child is not expected to repeat what you have said, but you are teaching your child to do more advanced talking. For example, if your child says “play ball”, you can reply and expand it to “let’s play ball” or “mummy/I play ball”.

• Be animated while you talk with your child, so as to make the activities you do together fun.

• Make use of mealtime, bedtime, playtime and bath time as opportunities for language stimulation. Children learn most from play and daily routines.

• Wait for your child to respond rather than rushing in to prompt him with an answer.

• Repeat what your child says to show that you are paying attention and are interested in what he says and does.

• Use simple words and phrases with very young children. For instance, if your toddler points to milk, say “drink milk” or “you want milk?” and not “would you like to drink some milk?”, “tell mummy that you want milk first”.

• Make eye contact with your child when you talk to him.

Are you listening to me?

Isn't it amazing how your child's hearing starts to deteriorate in certain specific ways between the ages of seven and nine? Now she doesn't hear you when you ask her to tidy her room or wash her dirty cup. Strangely though, she hears the start of her favourite television programme despite the fact that she is talking to a friend on her mobile phone at the same time. Children of this age have a remarkable ability to ‘switch off’ when they don’t want to hear something.

SELECTIVE ATTENTION

Psychologists call this ‘selective attention’, because in many instances, your child makes a choice not to respond to you; she chooses to react to some things that she hears while ignoring others. This is not a deliberate, planned process, but is one that happens without her thinking about it at all.

Remember though, that her lack of response could, at times, be genuine reasons. For instance, she may really not have heard you call out to her. Perhaps the sound of your voice was drowned out by the music surging through her iPod earphones. Or maybe she was so absorbed in an activity that she blocked out everything else. Nine-year-olds can be so interested in something that their attention is totally taken up with it, to the complete exclusion of everything else. If you are at all unsure, give your child the benefit of doubt.

IMPROVING LISTENING SKILLS

Here are techniques that you can use to encourage your child to listen to you when you speak to her:

Eliminate distractions: The more distractions surrounding your child, the less likely she is tune in to your comments. Background noise drowns out the sound of your voice, and also wants her to focus on you alone, mute the television or radio.

Use her name: Your child will instinctively turn around when she hears her name, even in circumstances where she would rather continue with her current activity. This is a reflex reaction. When you want her to listen to you, say her name clearly and loudly (without shouting), then pause for a moment or two before continuing with what you want to say to her.

Reduce the distance between you: Your eight-year-old hears you more easily when you are close to her. This is common sense, but human nature is such that parents often shout at the top of their voice when trying to attract their child’s attention, rather than stop what they are doing and walking over to her before they start speaking.

Ask her to repeat: Explain to her “I’m going to tell you something and I want you to repeat it to me when I have finished”. The knowledge that she has to repeat what you are about tp tell her verbally will ensure that she listens, understands and concentrates on your instructions while you are giving them. If you do tell her that you intend to get her to repeat what you have said, make sure you follow through it.

OPTING OUT

If you are sure that your child aged seven to nine deliberately switches off when you try to engage her. Address the issue honestly and directly, without getting angry. Make it clear to her that you think she has deliberately ignored you, and that this upsets you. Explain that when she deliberately doesn’t listen to you, she makes you feel unimportant. Discuss with her how she would feel if you chose to ignore her too. This may make her realise that she needs to be more attentive to you in future.